Patience for Purpose

Sometimes it seems like bringing home our baby is unreachable, because we've submitted profiles, we've been saving, the loan people haven't called back, and your just having one of those weeks where your just feeling anything and everything but positive. Then you wake up the next morning and  it is raining and thundering in January in Ohio and you think, "Well that is odd." And suddenly a weight is lifted and your not so stressed and you go about your day with purpose and a sense of timing that all things will work out.

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

~Jeremiah 29:11

My idea of the future sometimes wants to be now instead of next week, next month, or even next year. I suppose it is my lacking ability to be patient and thankful for the present by throwing all my consciousness into the adoption process and just my womanly desire to have my baby now not later. What I need to do is remember that God has a plan for us and it is for a good future and stop worrying about tomorrow.

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

~Matthew 6:34

It all comes down to focus. There is literally so much to do in the adoption process that it is difficult to turn it off when you need to for your own sanity. I absolutely love babies and I just can't wait to bring ours home to their family and begin our journey together. With that said though what I need to do more than anything is step back a little, like Keith does so well, and say yes I want my baby here now (this second), but that is something I cannot do anything about. I lack all control in this effort. I need to give that anxiety, stress, and malcontent over to God and be thankful for all that I have and be patient for the future I know we'll have. Life never takes the course that we would design ourselves, but the lessons a long the way make us better and if this waiting will make me be a better mother, if only to understand the true miracle of life, then I will take it. I don't think I will ever do anything harder, more valuable or meaningful in life than be a mother; and if this is training to strengthen my resolve, then that is what I will do.