Imparting Traditions

Today is a big day in Ohio, it's a day where everyone that lives within the state suddenly becomes avid football fans, including myself. What is so special about today? It's OSU vs. Michigan Game Day. Perhaps one of the biggest rivalries that College football has today. For me, I just want to see Michigan lose and Ohio State triumph. Of course this year is a little different, we've had a tough years with inquiries and investigations that I honestly find rather pathetic, but the actions of a few do not define the Ohio State Buckeyes.

Growing up this was an exciting time, my Dad would take my siblings and I over to my Grandma and Grandpa's house to "watch" the game with them and the rest of the family. Grandma would make a giant pot of chili and about two loaves of peanut butter sandwiches. The game would start and us kids would slowly trickle into the play room and play with my cousins as my Dad, Uncle, Aunts, and Grandparents shouted at the t.v. screen. The louder it got the worse the team would play, but that didn't disturb us kids. We would laugh and play games, create plays from the old story books, and play schoolhouse; with my cousin Sarah the teacher and the rest of us her students.

Now as we are all grown up we tend to watch the game. I prefer to watch the second half and help my Mom with the Chili. Both Grandma and Grandpa have gone to heaven now, but the traditions they instilled in us live on and they are forever in our hearts. As we move through these early weeks of the Winter it reminds me of them so much. They were truly devoted parents and grandparents and we were completely blessed to have them. Traditions are very important for families, mine as well. As you grow up you love these little subtle things you would do, from making chili to putting up the Christmas Tree with a certain CD playing in the background, but as you get older you realize how special those little details really made and how close they brought you to your family.

As we begin our trip towards building our family its the subtleties and details that we begin paying close attention to, making mental notes to make sure we continue these traditions on. For our children we hope this will provide a sense of belonging, history, and togetherness that only traditions can impart.  Nothing beats togetherness and a little O-H!!!!! Have a wonderful day!

The Waiting Game...

Probably the worst part about the adoption process is the waiting. You rush through the early stages completing paper work, finding paper work, getting the home study visits done with, which includes cleaning the house till it is spot less and maintaining that (which I don't really mind, lol cleaning is fun for me.), then installing safety devices, completing the in-home homework, and finally creating your profile. Once all of the above is completed there really isn't anything to do, but sit and wait.

Waiting is the worst part thus far. I could handle finding paper work, the interviews with our social worker, the homework that was actually very helpful and insightful, then the cleaning, and completing our profile was actually really interesting. All in all our Adoption process has gone by very smoothly since finding an agency. We couldn't be happier with the speed it took, but as I said, now the waiting game begins.

Like anything else in life, when times get hard its important to focus on the important things. I am, at times, a slow learner. After the process was completed I totally had an unrealistic expectation of the final stages to bringing home our baby. The process was so quick that I thought maybe, just maybe, we would have our baby home by Christmas. We submitted our profile and I was completely crushed when we were not chosen. It was rather defeating. But, as always, Keith was there for me and his ability to look on the brighter side and cheer me up again was fantastic.

Though we won't have our baby home for Christmas, I've taken this as our reality, its important to remember to be thankful for all that we do have, especially since it is the week of Thanksgiving. I can't imagine going through this process with out Keith by my side. We've grown a lot as a couple since deciding that we wanted to start a family. We've leaned on each other and soared through the process with immense ease and came out stronger as a solid unit.

Yesterday's sermon at Church hit home particularly with me and my general disdain for my lack of a baby or the knowledge of when or where they will come to us from. The Pastor spoke about truly embracing what we have, looking at what we do have as oppose to what we do not have. It is all about focus. Where do our focus linger and how can we control that focus?

For me finding focus was a simple reality check through a self-assessment. I was focusing on the fact, again, that I was childless, that I wouldn't have a baby for Christmas, and again I was sitting there as I had been before in my Grandparents living room years ago with out my Red Rider BB Gun, but with a perfectly wonderful array of toys yet I was completely unhappy simply because I didn't get that Red Rider BB Gun that I had specifically asked for about twenty thousand times. I was crushed.

If I just would have stopped for a second, paused and looked around, I would have seen that wonderful art set that I got from the gift exchange and the comics from my Grandparents that I still cherish to this day. I was being selfish, spoiled slightly by the idea that if you ask you'll get it. Not realizing that time-frames are always apart of the equation.

Just as today, I needed to look at what I did have. I needed to be thankful, first of all for my wonderful husband and soul mate, my loving and goofy puppy, our wonderful house, my supportive and loving family and our friends that we consider family. All of which I am truly thankful and blessed to have. Without each one of these Keith and I would be lost, without the love, friendship, and amazing support we are so grateful to have. I live a truly blessed life, and though the only thing missing is our Child here in our arms, I really wholeheartedly believe that God has it in his plans in the foreseeable future, in his time frame, not ours to again bless our lives with.

Just like that Christmas years ago a lesson remains to be learned for me. As I sat there sulking, after everyone had finished unwrapping their gifts and the kids began to play, the adults began reading instructions, or talking amongst themselves, I looked up to see my Grandma beckoning me to the other room. I got up, stepping over the immense flow of wrapping paper and my cousins playing happily on their floor, and follow Grandma into the TV room where Grandpa, my Mom and Dad stood with big grins on their faces. Then Grandma reached inside of the closet and pulled out a long narrow box wrapped in Santa paper. The smile that spread across my face as I tore through the paper to find my new Official Red Ryder BB Gun never left my face that Christmas and that moment of finally holding what I so wanted as a eight year old tomboy that Christmas, well I'll never forget that feeling.

I have been forgetful and taken the truly wonderful pieces of my life for granted and focused completely on what I didn't have instead of all the blessings I have around me. I can honestly say going into this Thanksgiving I find myself with a wonderful feeling of being blessed. God has blessed my life with so many wonderful things and people that give my life such meaning and joy. I can't wait till we finally meet our baby, but today I am certainly counting my blessings for all that I do have and all that will be coming our way.

Our Journey Thus Far...

Our journey began a few years ago. When Keith and I first met we knew it was unlikely we would be able to conceive naturally. So we tried and it never took, so we decided that we would go ahead and shoot for adoption. Growing up we were exposed to adoption so when natural conception was an option, Adoption was natural.

In 2010 we decided to start saving up for an adoption, and in the early Spring of 2011 we got our first taste of the reality of adoption. We were introduced to a young lady that was about to begin college and as far as we knew was completely committed to providing a family for her baby through adoption. We really thought this was it and we began making preparations. Unfortunately the birth mother was not as eager about adoption as she had led of to believe and so she ended up choosing another lady, but in the end she decided to raise the baby. We were so happy for her, but at the same time we were a bit devastated. That's the road of adoption, it has many peaks, and many, many dips. So we continued saving and searched out an Adoption Agency that could help us a long the road and hopefully guard us a little too.

We finally found Building Blocks Adoption Service, Inc. They are located in Medina, Ohio and they have a wonderful staff that have been very helpful, positive, knowledgeable, and understanding. We moved through the preliminary stages rather quickly as I was able to some how find all the documents and get a lot of the leg work done during the day while Keith was working. Then we began our Home Study process in Late July 2011 and finished up in September 2011. The Home Study process was not as difficult as I imagined. Our caseworkers/Social Worker was wonderful and understanding. She answered all our many questions and did so cautiously, letting us know the truth and facts about what we were getting into. Which is honestly what we needed. Reality is always better than hopes leaned on high expectations.

By the end of October we had all the paper work in place and our caseworkers was able to write and file our official home study report. We were just approved for a Domestic Newborn Adoption two weeks ago and we've been working to find our birth mother. The difficult part has now begun, the waiting and hoping.

Home Study Approved

As of November 3, 2011 we are officially approved to adopt a newborn child up to twelve months! It's a very exciting time for us, one step towards our goal of becoming a family!

Our Adoption Journey

This blog is to help us find a birthmother that can share their wonderful gift with us. I'm still working on the blog and getting all the information I hope a birth mother may want to know about a potential family for their child. Please feel free to contact me if you have any questions! Thanks and have a lovely day!